The Cricketary Tales of Jeffrey Jawser
Home | Table of Contents | Translator with Jeffrey | PROLOGUE | The Locusts on Migration | Migration: Page Two | Migration: Page Three | Migration: Page Four | The Poet's Introduction | Intro: Page Two | Intro: Page Three | Intro: Page Four | Intro: Page Five | Intro: Page Six | Intro: Page Seven | Intro: Page Eight | Intro: Page Nine | Intro: Page Ten | Intro: Page Eleven | Intro: Page Twelve | Intro: Page Thirteen | The Bison's Tale | Bison: Page Two | Bison: Page Three | Bison: Page Four | The Serpent's Tale | Serpent: Page Two | Serpent: Page Three | Serpent: Page Four | Serpent: Page Five | The Salmon's Tale | Salmon: Page Two | Salmon: Page Three | A Whale of a Tale | Whale: Page Two | Whale: Page Three | Whale: Page Four | Whale: Page Five | Whale: Page Six | Whale: Page Seven | Whale: Page Eight | Whale: Page Nine | The Hummingbird's Tale | Hummingbird: Page Two | Hummingbird: Page Three | Hummingbird: Page Four | Hummingbird: Page Five | Hummingbird: Page Six | The Tern's Tale | Tern: Page Two | Tern: Page Three | Tern: Page Four | Contact the Author
Whale: Page Seven

"Renounce all bulls?" Delicia pressed Hydra to once more elucidate the grounds for this policy. For Delicia could not fathom why such swell creatures as Kriryl, Faunian and Hilaryous - so beauteous and well-made - were rotten to the core.

Hydra did stoop to explain, and in typical whale fashion - in a song:

A Blue Whale fair, of lineage high,
Was loved by a Bull, in the days gone by -
The Whale was radiant as the sun,
The Bull was a most unsightly one
So it would not do
His scheme fell through,
For the Whale, when his love grew visible,
Expressed such terror
At his monstrous error,
That he stammered an apology most sorrowful:
The picture of a disconcerted Bull!

With a view to rise in the social scale
He shaved his bristles, and he docked his tail,
And to start in life on a plan laudable,
He titled himself Darwinian Bull!

But it would not do,
The scheme fell through
For the Blue Whale fair, whom the mad Bull craved,
Was a radiant being
With a brain far-seeing
While Darwinian Bull, though well behaved,
At best is only a mammal shaved!

Drawing by Larry Foster

While Hydra was singing the bull Hilaryous was able to paddle quietly and to steal ever closer to her. Suddenly he was at Hydra's side, whacking her with his flippers, biting her on the back, throwing himself completely out of the water. He cried aloud in ultra-sonic sounds "You must give me the why and wherefore! What is the source, the spring, of this outlandish conduct?"

Finally confronted snout to snout, the Princess softened. "Yes, I will account for my behavior. The fountainhead lies in a maidenhead - that of my grandma, Lizzy Gaga."

"In her time you bulls were always away at war, in constant combat with the killer whales."

Killer Whales

"Lizzy longed for the joys of marriage and motherhood. But she was as virginal as I am - had never known a bull. The wars, the wars! The bulls were always off to war.

"Her friend Marine was fully familiar with bulls. She knew the splashing and the thrashing, the whacking and the biting. Marine had thrilled with enravishment when six bulls did dive beneath her with much pushing and shoving. Marine mated with two lusty bulls - one right after the other!

"Marine had wallowed in love play for hours. She skimmed the surface and basked in the sun while a bull would roll belly up beneath her. Yes, Marine did feel his organ - ten feet long and curved like the crook of a tree. She heard his low-pitched moans. She embraced him with her flippers - caressed all hundred feet of him."

Drawing by Rod Ruth

"Marine knew what it was to give birth to a 5500 pound calf twenty-four feet long. To feel her baby suck her immense nipples... To watch the infant gain two hundred pounds a day on her milk: fifty gallons a day she fed him - a ton of nutrition every day. She saw her calf grow a foot longer every day on this milk, ten times richer than that of a cow.

"Yes, Marine had known all this but not Lizzy - not my Grandma Gaga. For now all the bulls were off to war."